Goosebumps titles

I remember being a child, a whimsical child, and reading Goosebumps by spooky Jewish writer R.L Stine (His stories were spooky, not his Jewishness.)

Most people I knew bought them solely based on whichever cover looked the most interesting, because children are scum.

Here are what the stories would be titled if the cover was a 100% accurate reflection of the content because I have an asinine sense of humour....

Sigh.